trying2lead

Lack

James 1:2-6 (TNIV)

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.

I lack.  I lack Joy this week.  This week I have been surrounded by death.  As a pastor it is tough to hear about the pains of those you love, care for and shepherd during their darkest hours.  The loss of a friend, a child or a parent.  So I sit in silence as I pray to my God.  Emotionally I am done.  Done feeling the weight of the world and the pain that shoulders bare.  I have no more tears.  I am dry.

I lack.  I lack Wisdom this week.  This week I have been surrounded by questions.  Most of the questions have no answers.  I feel empty and useless when I do not respond.  I feel like a waste when I have no answers.  So I ask.

Prayer -

God I lack.  Give me wisdom.  Pour out your Spirit on me.  I do not doubt.  I believe and know you will give me what I lack.  So I wait, on you, Lord.

Quote

What needs to die in me in order for the will of God to come forth in and among us?

- Ruth Barton Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership

As I read this sentence in the 12th chapter of her book I was rocked.  The chapter was on discernment and the process by which a team can discern answers from God.  In the chapter she outlined how discern.  It blew me away.

If I was honest I would have to admit that most of my discernment is based on intuition.  Also I would have to admit that I try all the human ways to understand an issue and exhaust them first, then I turn to the Lord and ask Him what He thinks.

So what needs to die?  My process.  I must seek God first and then after discerning God's answer apply my human skills to accomplish it.

Prayer - 

God that you would be first.

That I would look to you first.

That my answers would only come from you.

That I would align with your purpose and directions.

That I could do only that which the father directs me.

Amen